1 Verily I say unto you my friends, fear not, let your hearts be comforted; yea, rejoice evermore, and in everything give thanks;

2 Waiting patiently on the Lord, for your prayers have entered into the ears of the Lord of Sabaoth, and are recorded with this seal and testament—the Lord hath sworn and decreed that they shall be granted.

3 Therefore, he giveth this promise unto you, with an immutable covenant that they shall be fulfilled; and all things wherewith you have been afflicted shall work together for your good, and to my name’s glory, saith the Lord.

D&C 98:1-3

This scripture feels particularly pertinent to our situation right now. I think that it is amazing the dichotomy the Lord sets up to try our faith. On the one hand he gives us afflictions, but on the other we have the constant assurance that he is watching out for us. We have been able to keep our faith during this time, and we are sure it will be strengthened on the other side of this journey.

I had an experience yesterday that is a microcosm of the ups and downs we have been through. On Monday morning we were excited because I had two job interviews set up. One was for a full-time job, in the Direct Mail industry, that we felt would just be a good chance to practice interviewing. We weren't too serious about it. The company, LW Robbins Associates, is located about 40 miles West of us, but very close to the major highways, so the trip took about 40 minutes. My interview went very well. Two managers were in with me, and they were impressed with my knowledge of the industry and my previous work experience. They were honest about the fact that they put in plenty of hours, but they are flexible and allow them to be done on my schedule. This was promising because I do not want another job that keeps me away from my family. I left feeling good, with the expectation that they would call me in a day or two if they wanted to make me an offer.

I left and headed straight into Boston for my second interview. Now, I don't know how many of you have driven in Boston, but I do know that many of you have driven in foreign countries. With all the construction that is going on right now, Boston is like driving in a foreign country. You don't know where the roads are taking you, you can't tell which road you are on most of the time, and when you find the road you need it is one-way -- the wrong way. Plus the drivers are insane.
I was exiting the Mass Pike (I-90) to get onto I-93 (another highway). This is a three-part exit all on a curve. You take the sharpest curve to head North (which I wasn't), the middle curve to head South (which I was) and the longest curve to get into the city. So, as I am trying to make sure I get into the right lane, all the while slowing down because the construction makes this interchange very slow, a car flys up on my left, cuts me off, and slams on his brakes because he was going so fast.
Now, let me paint you another picture. I have a 1993 dark blue Ford Escort Station wagon that we bought for under $1000 almost 2 years ago. The car is a trooper. It has run well for the last 2 years but I know it needs some work in places, for instance the brakes don't stop on a dime. We are just trying to hang onto it until we are in a position to buy a new car for Mia, then I will get the Altima as a hand-me-down.
So, there I am, in my long, large car with another driver slamming on his brakes. I slam on my brakes. I don't know how long this whole thing took, but I could tell while braking that I wasn't going to have enough room to stop. As I am thinking this, I hear a little 'POP' and feel the tension on my brake pedal release. At that moment, I knew for sure that I wasn't going to have time to stop. So, I look over my shoulder as I am turning my wheel to get into the left lane. Fortunately, I got over in time and there was enough of a gap that I was able to use the little brake function I had left to stop.

So, here I am, in the middle of the city, still on a highway, with just the slightest braking power left. And I still had to get to my interview, which I didn't know exactly where it was. The picture of me driving right through the heart of downtown Boston (literally) getting just a little lost, and then finding a parking garage and deciding to walk to my interview, would best not be pictured by anyone who feels I should not have tried anymore driving.
But I did. I made it into the garage, and went to my interview. This was at a Staffing company, Professional Staffing Group, and they were a busy one. I have applied with some other staffing agencies, their offices were small, they took time to meet with me and discuss what I was interested in doing, and haven't found anything for me since. This one felt like a mill. There were about 10 other people in the lobby area, which was very close to the open call center with about 20 employees talking to people on the phone, asking them questions, setting up appointments for them. I filled out a book full of forms and was finally ushered to the wall behind the call center which was lined with small stalls, each with a frosted, opaque sliding door and one small round table. I was given a booklet on the staffing company and waited. The recruiter I met with was energetic. She took notes while we spoke and let me describe most of what I as looking for. Then she said that there was a month-long position she thought I would be good for. She said that she would email me the details and I could call her if it sounded like a job I wanted to pursue.

So, I left feeling that things were going pretty well on the job front. I had done some interviews; I was still pursuing some freelance work on my own, and now had the potential for some real work. When I got back to my car, there was a message from Mia. The first company I had interviewed with had called to give me a job offer. I called her back, didn't tell her about the brakes and asked what they said. She told me that the message was just a name and number.

Well, and if you all think me foolish you can join with my wife in telling me so, I climbed back into my car and drove out of Boston, slowly, and made it home safely. I called the LW Robbins back, expecting to say "Thank you but no thank you." Well, I get on the phone and the woman from HR says, the managers liked you, they want to offer you this much -- it was a large jump up from my last job -- at which point I mouthed it to Mia, and then told the woman I needed to talk with my wife about it.

We went back and forth. Was it worth taking the job because the money was good? Was it worth risking the long nights? Mia said to call back and ask if the flexibility they talked about meant that I could leave at 5:00PM and go in early the next morning to finish up. We decided that it didn't hurt to ask, so I called back, left a message and asked. We received a return call a little later; saying that she had asked the managers and that would be fine. As long as I got my work done, they don't really want me staying late. I asked for a few days to think about it.

The next day, I took my car to the shop. We weren't sure what was going to happen, but we knew that we needed to get it fixed, because however much it cost, it was still cheaper than starting car payments again. The estimate came back at $1,100 because I had to replace, drums, rotors, brake pads, and tire rods for my front tires. We put in on our new United card and decided not to worry about it right now.

So, here we are, still stuck on deciding what to do. I want to try my hand at some of the more creative aspects of marketing, doing more writing, doing some editing, doing some layout, or any of the various other possibilities. On the other hand, I want to show some consistency, build some experience working with vendors and budgets, get into a job that would help further a career managing work.

I feel like I am at a crossroads. Which direction do I decide to take my career? Do I go for the management side or the tactical side? Do I go back into an office from 9-5 (or 7-5 or 9-6 or whatever the hours are) because it is stable, or can I viably work from home while supporting my family. It is not an easy decision to make. I have been trying diligently this week to pray, seek the Spirit, and be aware of the path that the Lord wants me to take. While I haven't found my answer yet, I have felt reassured that whatever course our life takes, He is watching us. He is mindful of what we are doing and will support our family.