Imagination Running Wild

Ethan has a very active imagination. If you've ever known any 3-year olds, this might be familiar to you.

Today a couple of funny things have happened:

1. He was lying on the couch (something that I was doing this morning) and told me he wasn't taking a rest but was just thinking. When I asked what he was thinking about he said, "Forts and TV shows."

2. Ethan and I were building forts out of couch cushions this morning. It's one of Ethan's favorite things to do.

3. During nap time, Ethan was lying in bed and pulled the covers over his head so the Evil Emperor Zerg couldn't kill his head. Then he put his hands out to see if Zerg would kill his hands. Then he put his feet out to see if Zerg would kill his feet. He pulled his feet back in saying, "No, I need those to walk."

4. He was captivated while watching an episode of Vroom Riders. Is that out on DVD yet. ;)

What a fun, funny little boy.

Quiet time

The last few days, Ethan has decided that naps just aren't for him. As you can imagine, this is quite a problem for Mia and I.

We keep trying to do the nap time routine but Mia's had to resort to Quiet Time instead. This consists of Ethan playing in his room for a little while and then watching a movie while Mia's in the office.

Unfortunately, it's not the same as getting a real break during the day. We are hoping he'll start taking naps again one of these days.

Retraction Part 3

So, let this be a lesson to me. I shouldn't post things to my blog that may be controversial. I hope this will be the last retraction that I have to post.

Last night as I was getting Ethan ready for bed, I told him that we were going to take a bath. He pointed his finger at him and told me "No!"
I pointed my finger back at him and said that we were going to.

He pointed his finger, a little more emphatically, and said, "No. I'm going to fight you." I told him that I wasn't going to fight and went the table to clear some dishes. He ran over, said it again, and then hit me on the leg.

Neither Mia or I know where he picked that up. But it certainly isn't something a wimpy child would do.

Of course, I did have to pick him up at that point and tell him that we don't hit people. And then, we got ready for this bath.

Retraction Part 2

The 4th of July is all about the fireworks. At least, that's how I was raised. And how I'm planning on raising my son.

That meant we had to keep Ethan up well past his bedtime but Mia convinced me that it was worth it. He had a blast during the time leading up to the fireworks. Then, when they started doing a few test shots, he would cling to Mia or me and say "I want to go home." Since we were there with some friends, we decided that we were going to stick it out.

So we let Ethan snuggle on our laps, he was getting tired. Once the fireworks started for real, Ethan snuggled into me and wanted me to cover his ears. He also kept asking to go home. I kept covering his ears but we told him that we were going to stay. After a while, I stopped blocking his ears and just kind of putting my hand loosely over top of them. Then, when my hands got tired, I put my sweatshirt over his ears for him to hold. He did that for a while, then started enjoying the fireworks and would point at them and say "Boom!"

By the end of the night, he was having a great time. So, my son has already started on the proud tradition of 4th of July fireworks.

Retraction

Well, it looks like I can point to my first case of me trying to use Ethan as a way to re-live my own childhood and make changes per my own recollections of the past.

In my last post I chided him for being a wimp. In retrospect, the park was very crowded that day and Ethan wasn't up from his name for too long when we went over. And, if you look a little closer, I always feel that some of my childhood was spent being a scrawny little kid who was afraid to do things.
Now, I know that there were plenty of things that I wasn't afraid to do (reckless things, my parents might say) but the memory is a funny thing. And the highlights often tend to be the memories that we don't want to think about.

I took Ethan to the spray park again this weekend. He was a little shy at first but this time started having fun after only a few minutes. There were almost no other kids (especially big kids that tend to run around without looking) and he started braving some of the things that seemed so scary the day before.

Maybe while he's still young it's better that I learn that he's a unique person with unique desires and fears. I can certainly do my part to provide him the opportunities to grow but I'm not going to be able to mold him into the idealized image of myself at his age. Or, at least, I can't do that without having him crack that mold wide-open at some point and rebel in ways that may be harmful to himself.

Looks like it's time for me to go back to learning how to be a parent. You'd think after 2.5 years I'd have it all figured out. Sheesh.

Language

Ethan was exploring language this morning. Specifically he was interested in expletives. Now, I know that it's not a good trend to start so young in life and I didn't laugh or encourage him, but now that I'm away from the house I can say how cute it was.
Especially in his squeaky voice.

And, because those of you reading this blog will know that Mia and I don't swear, I'll let you know that he was saying things like

"My gosh" In front of sentences or as he was spilling milk while eating breakfast.

"Oh brother" After breakfast while we were playing with his new Teddy Bear (created at Build-a-Bear, as yet unnamed).

So, I guess it's not too bad. ;)

Parenting

So, I want to make just a quick post about active and passive parenting. I've been thinking about this a lot because I take are of Ethan at the beginning and end of the day. And of course on the weekends.

But, in the mornings I find that I'm just coming out and letting Ethan watch TV while I lay on the couch for just a little longer. I've tried to tell myself that I'm not going to do this but when I'm in the moment, in the actual morning, I don't remember those promises.

In the evenings, I do better. We have been making trips to the park lately because the sun is out longer now (thanks DST) and the weather is warmer. I feel better about doing that because it means that I'm engaging with Ethan. But even then, like on our 2 hour trips, I brought a book so that I could just let him run his energy out. I didn't have a chance to sit down and read it all that much but the intention was there.

Active parenting -- The time spent with kids playing, running, reading, doing things.
Passive parenting -- The time your kid spends interacting with things that are not you.

I shouldn't come down so hard on passive parenting. It can be very useful when things like dishes, cleaning, vacuuming need to get done. Or just when then parent needs a little sanity. But it's an easy parenting style to fall into as the default.

Ethan is getting better about playing with himself without just watching TV. He likes to read books, run around the house, and play with trains.

Some of the things that I need to do more actively are read, sing, run, and build things with him. I'll have to keep working on those.